September 2003 Archives

I sit here and I can't think of anything usefull. I know I logged into blogger, and I am sure I had something to write about, yet nothing is in my head. Except, chocolate malt frapuccino. I was going to stop and get some at starbucks, but the line was rather large, and I didn't want to be late for class. So I just walked past starbucks craving that creamy chilled chocolate swirled treat. It's a sugar craving of course, and I ended up just eating normal food. Well, if considers balance bars as meals as normal, then it was indeed normal.

Anywho, I just finished my Economics test, in which I think I did very well. Except for 2 questions in the beggining, which I was completelly confused about. Those I just eliminated the obviously wrong ones, and put in one of the 2 remaining that sounded the best. I am doing decently well on all my tests, and I am happy about that. Hooray for me. *Does the non existent, freshly created good tests boogie*

Internal Laugh: Hunter is all serious while he is typing away at a Posting Board for his class. It's funny. Although he is earning his grade by doing that. It's been 2 minutes since he should have left. Ever so amusing, he is so deep into it.

Well, it's time for ME to go to class now. Get a wonderful lesson of Calc One. Which no doubt will add on to everything I haven't learned yet. Ohh well, makes things more interesting...

So, on my previous post "stuck" I told the story of how I lost my keys and my phone and was about to head to the MARTA Station.

Here's the very interesting story that ensued...

So, I headed to the MARTA station. I took the train there, and met my mom on my way to the parking deck. Mom brought me up to the forth floor with her car. Ohh, the our two dogs were in the car, and acting insane. That being besides the point, we arrived at my car. There was a red tag on the window.

I thought at the moment. "Shit, I got a ticket." I did wonder why, because my car was parked legally, and it was there for less than 24 hours. So, I read the ticket, and as I am about to read what they marked, a MARTA police officer shouts: "Hey sir, you forgot you car running with the keys inside. You are lucky that noone broke your window. So, at that exact time, in the back of my head, I just head a "DUH!"

So, I forgot my car running, with the keys inside, in a public parking place, for 13 hours. Yet, it was still running, and the doors were locked when I came back. Also, I forgot my exit ticket for the car inside. That means that someone could just jam the window down, and get out without it being suspicious.

Mom, of course, asked the officer, if anyone had done this kinda thing before. She said she's been with MARTA for a long time, and yet noone had done it. Gee, that adds some bonus point for my stupidity.

Hey, I am ever so glad that I did NOT lose my keys. Also, my car was all warmed up, and filled with Carbon Monoxide, since I left the air on full blast. Also, since I relayed the story to my sister, all her friends keep coming up to me. They say "Hey, can I borrow yer keys? I think you might left it running again." I wish I had the ability to conjure up something heavy to throw at them.

Ehh, anyways, I now make sure that my keys are on my hand as I exit the car. Indeed, I am uber absent minded.

I am here at school, stuck partially. I lost my keyes, and I have also lost my cell phone. Well, I think I left my cell phone at home, but that's besides the point. It sucks really. Now I gotta get a ride to the Marta station with someone who has a cell phone, because my mom is going to have to come by there with my keys.

My life is going great, and things are fine, but sometimes I am in a place of displacement. I am my own person, and like everyone else, have my own opinions and thoughts. Yeah, that's all great, but it gets iffy at times. I say one thing more then people want to hear. They just sit there, and generally ignore me and go back to the things they were doing. I am invisible after that people want to hear of me.

Also, I sometimes how up, I want to join in, but everyone seems joined in as much as that space fits at the time. Today I was walking by Surge and Alisson. I wanted to stop and talk to Surge, but he was having a jolly time listing to Alisson's explanation of whatever. So, I just smiled since I saw him, looked blankly at the situation, and just walked by and went to get some food. It was weird, yet it seemed just fine. Everyone is in their own world with their own agenda. Sometimes things happen to be in the same time-space continuum, and sometimes they just don't go together.

So, that is my standard response when someone coments on something I did, that is slight umm, offish. Well, it varies, but there is always a "Well," and an "Umm."

This one time, I was heating something up, and someone asked me if I wanted to burn the pizza. I know I had something in the microve, and yes, it was kinda getting really hot. My reply was not, "Yep, it's sure burning." It's usually Well, but, umm... It's just heating up. I could just agree, but I always end up giving a explanation. I just like to give and get explanations of random shibitz.

As an aside, I enjoy quipping about random stuff. Since it's random, one can't really get stuck on a topic. Although, people do get stuck starring me with blank faces once I say something that doesn't quite make sense. Well, I often say stuff that doesn't quite make sense. That's my quirk. The more a person hangs out with me, the more that person understands the things they didn't understand at first. It's like really singular inside jokes, that are inside me. I get it, and through some funky kinda friend osmosis, people that hang out with me eventually get what I am saying.

I enjoy being me, and doing the things I do. It assures me that I am unique like everyone else. Very conforting I must say. In the past I conceptualized people I wanted to be like, and headed towards that way. As time passes I found out that I got my own way of doing things. Also I figured out that it's ok to not be, or act like things that most people deem ideal.

Life is a weird jorney of discovery, and the more one finds things out, the wiser they are.

I am happy that I finally got back into my diet. Well, that is because finally balance bar prices dropped the wonderful 1 dollar or below mark. Therefore I now always have something to eat, and won't be eating fast food. I know I repeat this over and over, but it's just the way things are. Also, I've been walking more and more at school. One reason is because I have no choice, and that my classes are far. The other is because I want to get more in shape. Therefore, I always take the stairs. No escalators or elevators for me.

I need to make time to study. I need go to get bookstore, and buy a planner. I gotta make sure, that I don't buy one for the wrong period, just like I did the last 2 times. Silly really, but when I see the calendar starts on January 2004, it's no longer useful. I got a board, and I write stuff in there. That is kinda usefull, but I need a full blown organization plan.

***BLEAH***

Agh, so I didn't study that much for my test. So, I kinda missed a question or two. Ohh, and it was not because I missed the concepts. I totally understood the concepts. The problem again was on the Algebra backend for the whole thing. Gaw, I get them, but I just can't seem to use some right things on the right places. Good thing I can drop my lowest test score *wahoo!!*

Bleah, out of everyone that I talk to, one person keeps telling me I talk too loud. I do have to agree, so it's not bad, but it's just a matter of note. Weird...

As I sit here, I stand as an outsider inside an inner circle. I am referring to Rampway. I hang out in the office, and see people working on their articles, having meeting, and working on reviewing stories and other of the sort. I am highly interested, yet do not say a peep. I tried talking to Joe, but got interupted by random events, so I just bailed out of it. Also, there is the whole deadline and required stuff to do. I would write occasionally about something that interests me, but that is about that for now. 40 hours of work, and way too much time at school is draining me sleep schedule, and my general ability to function. Better yet, to keep eyes open doing class, instead of zoning out and hearing half of what the professor says.

Go figure, I have fun, yet I stand as an outsider in an inside organization.

Again, I am ever so stuck with having to study for an upcoming test. Personally, I don't feel like doing it, but that will totally ruin my grade, so then follows GPA, and yadda yadda yadda. I got 10 sections and about 130 exercises to do. I gotta learn all this stuff by Wednesday morning. I am pretty sure that I Will get most of it down without a problem, but I don't think I will be able to get an A this time. Sure a B, probably, although it all averages out if I keep getting A's. Gaw, every semester I have an evil class that I have to deal with.

Anywho, talked to CS cute guy again. He has not been coming to class latelly, because if he does, he gets into traffic heavy. So, he just gets his assigments from a friend, and only comes to class when he needs to turn them in.

I decided to stay at school a little bit more today. Getting a change to hang out with people, and just "Shoot the shit" as it's said. I found out interesting things about interesting people, and that is all I am going to say. I wish people stayed true to themselves some times. It sucks when they don't.

Wahoo, I found out that there was nothing really wrong with me brakes. The only thing that happened, is that the pressure of the brake fluid wasn't correct, since previously it had not been changed correctly. So now my brakes are back to a weird normal. They work fine, and make no noise. I say it's a weird normal, simply because now they are not as touch senstive as they were before. I really gotta get used to that. Don't want to rear end anyone anytime soon.

As I sit here, rubbing my weary eyes, because work with school, and sleep, don't happen to mix. I realize, again, that I really hate ticking clocks. I just concentrate on the tick, and the tock, and can't pay attention to anything else. I don't mind a TV in the background, music, or wonrdeful wirling noises of my computer. I do mind clocks that tick. I can with a bit of time, fully rest with clocks, but they are still cumbersome. Hence, I have nothing that ticks on my room. I have have a brightly glowing light, wirling noises, and the occasional metalic noises of my hard drive saving stuff on the hard drive. They are all fine, and lull my gracefully to sleep. Go figure that stuff, because I can't...

Just maybe, I know all the stuff I should know for Calc, but it's just burried deep within a region of my brain I decided to ignore. Today when the teacher was explaining everything, all the stuff she brought back made sense. Also, I noticed I know all the concepts from the previous classes, but I just haven't used them enough to intuitivelly know where they go and why. Granted, knowing where they go and when, is part of the knowledge, but I have the basis to know it. Know, I just gotta prop down and do about 300+ mundane exercises to solidify everything I know. And also there is the fact that I will be having my first Test next wednesday. Unlike my 2 past math classes, I don't want to do really bad on my first test. It's bad habbit, and I gotta kick it like it's a bloodsucking alien that plans to skin me alive, and the slowly put my body in a giant body grinder. Yeah, gotta avoid it with that sort of urgency. Either that, or call the ever so illusive (and non existent, except for their concept in a movie) Man In Black.

Must remember to stop eating so much junk food. It's like, when I am at school, I just go for the food high in flavor, and high in making me increasingly fat. I know, promises promises. Heh, Dove's Promise, is such a good chocolate. It's like good with a side of good, and with some melt in your mouth good. The only bad part is the stomachache one gets after eating half a bag in one sitting. *raises his hand* I am guilty of that unfortunatelly. Also, I have learned my lesson, and no longer buy the bagged kind. If I am ever craving, I either buy the ice cream, or the little bar. That way, I can't pig out on dark chocolate, or milk chocolate yumminess.

Free time at school, is the perfect time to process my thoughts, and put them in a little piece of web paper.

I am sitting here in a chalky classroom, and I am reminded of my car brakes. The front one seems to be going out, and it makes squeeking, and screeching noises as I drive along (it does one or the other, depending if I am on a curve, or breaking, and so on.) I changed them recently, but for some strange reason they have decided to go evil again. I gotta get Mechanic to change it. Ohh, and I don't say the mechanic, because there is a spanish guy, that is a very good mechanic, so he is know as "Mechanic." He is kewl, but sometimes freaky. He has the hots for my mom, so she doesn't really like driving with him alone.

Anywho, he is damn good, and if I can find the front and read brakes for my car, I'll buy them. He should be in tonight at about 5. That is what we are planning at least. It all depends on the auto parts store(s) having the brakes.

Ohh, and I took MARTA train downtown today. I spent 5 minutes trying to get the tokens, and finally the guarding guy came by, try my bill, and just let me in. The machines were acting up, and he was aware of that. So I got a free ride downtown on MARTA, *smiles.* I will have to take the train until my breaks are fixed. I don't wanna be driving 79 miles on Hwy 85, and try to break, just to find out I can't. Yeah, too many random objects on the fast lane. Let's see, the last three were a broken armoire, and big white bench, and I think a wicket chair. All weird random pieces of furniture decorating the highway, and more or less making some cars go *boom*

It's life, it's the highway, we all get used to it. Well, as long as my car is intact, I will be used to it. When I get into a tragic car accident, I will shiver at the thought of a highway probably. Who knows...

As I sit here on the Rampway office, I wonder...

Jello is delicious, and with whipped cream is mega delicious. I was talking to Ness, and Sarah thought there were 3 people talking. Therefore, I sould like 2 people talking. I think that's rather amusing really. That means I can do comedic monologues with multiple characters (or something that.)

I am slowly meeting the staff at Rampway. I haven't figured out yet, except for the fact that I know Brad and Hunter. It's a fun office, they are an interesting organization at school, and also there is the fact that I have 1:30 hours with nothing to do in between my Calc 1 class, and my Intro to Computer Science Class.

Ehh, I really gotta study for my Calc 1 class. I had class today and I am somewhat TOTALLY CLUELESS about the subject. *ARGHH*

Ohh, and chicken quesadillas from the school tastes plain old awful. I shall not eat them anymore. That's a promise. Well, until next time I crave them and don't feel like walking to Taco Hell.

Life again is turning into a mundane...

Well, it's plain old mundane at the moment. I go to school, and I go to work. I am not doing anything outside that to tell the truth. As far as work goes, I don't really think about it outside work. It's the same with school. Although with school I should be doing more reading, and doing "homework." I had my first math quiz last week, and did not do so well. I knew the basic concept, and how everything went, but I could not put it together since I hadn't done any of the problems in the book. Practice makes perfect, and I am not practicing.

I am just going through the motions at the moment. I do have cares and worries, but I pay no attention to them. I am Unfocused. I need to find that key that connects everything. I need to see things as interesting again. It's not to say that things are uninteresting, of that I don't get any enjoyment from things, but not everything is clicking together.

Work is fun, and I've only had a medium amount of stress latelly. Then again, we don't have as many customers or clients, or even as many sales reps as we had before. It kinda sucks, because I like doing stuff with meaning, and reports and compiling the same old data again and again bores me to no end.

At school, all my teachers are nice, and all the subjects are easy to understand. While I do like english, and find history interesting, I am glad I am not taking those classes. I don't think I will need to take any more History classes. Although, I will have to take and endless amount of math related classes. Which I guess won't be that bad.

I need to get everything in my life synchronized and working harmonically.

Friday was evil, becuase I worked till midnight with mad rushing customers. When I thought I was going to leave, I got sent this customer with a complicated procedure, then he decided to return stuff, and purchase other stuff. Took a total of 30 minutes to ring out the guy. Saturday and Sunday were pretty much ranging from mundane to boring. Ohh, heh, except for the fact that the store manager came in late. He hated himself for doing so, and sincerelly apologized to everyone. He is responsible, and a good manager, but not everyone is perfect.

So, yesterday, I finally replenished my closet of this much needed items. I had to throw away some socks because they were getting worn. I had 1 useful pair of shoes, and 1 acceptable pair. Ohh, and I had to trash some undies, because they started getting holes. Yeah, it was time for me to go shopping. I did indeed, and I now have 4 pairs of shoes, instead of 1. I have a plethora of new undies, and nice socks. I got them for cheap too, since people forgot to take the tags down at the store, and gave me the cheaper price.

I did buy some ties. They were cheap, and I just could not pass them. They are plain and simple, but they add a variety to my dwindling tie collection. Dwindling because of freak accidents, and dogs. It's funny that the dog ate the tie with the duck. It sure shows his nature bound instincts.

In the past 2 days, Reina moved outta the house. She is the girl, that is 2 days older then me, that had a baby a few months ago. She's been friends with my sister for a long time, and she lived with us some time ago, when we were on the other house. She now decided to get an apartment, and is gonna live by her own accord. I think she has a roomate, that also has a baby, that works where she works.

She left in a mute note frankly. We would barelly see her, because she would always be at Edwards (baby's father) house. The same guy that didn't want much to do with her while she was pregnant. Anywho, he seemed to have turned a new leaf, and blah blah blah. She didn't say bye to anybody frankly. She didn't even tell us much about her plans. She just moved stuff out, and then yesterday, her room was empty, and she left a note. In the note she thanked us for being there with the baby, and for her living here, and so on. She said she would keep in touch, and that we knew where to call her. She also said that my mom would always be Geovanni's (her baby) Grandma. That is since she was adopted, and really had no contact with her adopted parents.

Ehh, I really don't have much of a opinion about the whole situation. She left, and we knew she was going to. She managed to detach herself plenty in the past 2 months, so there is no missing her. It was a gradual fade to black.