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Everyone has a border that they do now want go to if they gain weight.

My initial border, was 200 pounds. I crossed that, and was tormented by the number on the scale. There is only one bad thing, I am a stress eater. I gained weight because of stress, and the weight gain caused stress. This ends up in cyclic repetition. Eat more, feel bad about the weigh gained, so eat more.

The second threshold was my waist size. The last time I gained a large amount of weight, I went to a pant size of 38. This was acceptable, it was a on the larger side of life, but not outrageous.

I recently had to go out, and dress up better than normal everyday jeans. I realized, that 38 size pants would not cut it. I had to go to 40. I was shopping in the store, partially happy, because I was buying something new, but in the background depressed at the fact I had to but clothing to fit a larger body size than ever in my life. The scale at home reads 228. Having a body weight of 230 scares me.

My poison lies on sweets more than junk food. If I have a bad day, I hit a bag of chocolate. Yes, I eat a whole bag of chocolate. The kind varies, but the calories are usually 1500 to 2000 in one sitting. Each piece brings a small burst of relief. It's a delicious, and dangerous way to feel better. Sometimes I will go with ice cream, but equally so, I finish the whole container.

Relief in food is a dangerous habit that I have ingrained in my life.

I know the effect that all this extra weight is having on my body. I can feel it when I have to walk, and when I do anything that puts strain on the body. I sweat a bit more, and my breath is huffy.

My weight is now my biggest disruptor. When I don't feel healthy, my mind feels trashed. I don't perform optimally in the many facets of my life. This causes a feedback loop of negativity, and disappointment. I have become the biggest flow inhibitor in my life. I am aware I am the source of stagnation, and it's hard to move a large stationary object.

I have to get my life moving again, and start with a better focus on my body, and start forging new healthier habits to replace the old habits.

I might need some help on this one...

So, I am now back in Georgia.

It hasn't quite sunk in yet that I am here. It fees like I am visiting. I will see how things go when it finalyl settles in.

I haven't seen any of my old friends yet, so it still feels a bit disconnected. I am currently working from home, but the home is messy, and we are in the process of moving to a new townhouse. There is much to be setup, which should be fun. Granted, this time we are getting moves to help us a bit.

Ohh, there are many things that will be going on soon, but all in due time. :)

I have not been visiting the gym latelly, and I have not been eating very healthy. This is something that is detrimental, because the main side-effect of that, is that I gain weight. It's a simple as that.

As anyone can guess, I have been gaining some more weight. My body, is starting to have some rather undesireable attributes. I feel quite literally chunky.

I can assign reasons why I have not cared, but they are not excuses to why I have neglected to take care of myself. I still have a positive attitude about it, and I'm happy with myself, but there is much that can be done better.

I do love bagels in the morning, but they are not the best choice for breakfast. When one adds a delicious cup of hot chocolate, it makes for quite an unhealthy cocktail. Yes, of course it is delicious. If I wanted everything tasty in life, I would be even bigger than I am now. While I am not eating healthy, I have managed to exercise some restraint over the amount of food I eat. The problem with this, is that it's easy to stretch the limits of how much I eat over time.

If I keep going this way, it is only a matter of time, before my weight starts adverselly affecting my health. As of now, my system is already starting to strain with weight I keep adding on.

I know how to fix the problem, but I just have to get my state of mind regarding that in order. It takes planning to eat healthy, and also I have to manage my stress eating. Because while I can plan a healthy mean, it takes very little to go and get something that would be bad for me.

There should be a new Marcio, that weighs much less coming down the street shortly. I bet he will have new clothes, that just make him look damn good.

So Today,

I was planning on going out to Club Lucky Sunday.

It was all fine and dandy. I was going to meet up a friend over there, and it was going to be interesting. I was originally planning only to watch the drag show @ 10, and I was going to go home.

I was driving to the place, contacted friend, and he could not go. Again, it was fine, I was just going to see a drag show. I had the directions on my PDA, and it was all good.

So I try getting to the place, and I keep on not seeing it, I stop, try mapping it directly from the phone, and it seems to point to the same place. I park once or twice to get bearings. Once near a Denny's, and then once near some government buildings.

I try to pull up the map from another place, but then my internet on the phone is just not work. So, by now, the drag show is half way over, I seem to be lost, and I am miffed. I see a car that might be going to the same place, I follow it, and nope, a dud.

So, I end up going home, I bit annoyed. I get on my computer... Pull up the location AND...

The place that the map was telling me is correct. The only thing is that the entrance is off a road, back a bit, and then you turn into it. So, there was not way in hell I could have found it.

If I had read the location/direction info from the website page, that shows that, I would have seen that the entrance is not easy to find.

Arghhh!

Yeah, so I am at home, with the shirt I bought to go out on, and just annoyed at the fact I Didn't find, and then at the fact I passed by it about 5 times without knowing it. *sigh*

Maybe next sunday... Maybe.

Monday, at 5am, I got up, and went for a run.
Next day, Tuesday, at 5am, I got up, and went for a run.

Monday was fine, Tuesday I felt the kickback. I left all my muscles, coming back to life. Well, having the feeling of being used with vigor again.

I felt like I was a mummy at work Tuesday. That was very interesting indeed. My legs were heavy, my walk was funny, and my boss tells me, that still on the third day, I will feel it. Fun, fun fun.

So Wednesday, I will still wake up at 5am, and go run, because I should really. I know that here on after, I will not have to worry about things. Well, I will still feel the burn. That was all good.

But, I will keep running, and make it a habit. It's time I start taking care of my body again, age only progresses.

Hello everyone.

This blog will be neandering while I move to California.

I got a blogger blog for my roadtrip, since it's easy to post pictures, and do easy messages online from there. It's conveniet, and I needed that.

So the address is: http://marciocali.blogspot.com

Go visit it. Leave Messages. You will be able to see my trip as it goes along.

Toodles.

See y'all in California.

So, here's the deal. I accepted a job in California. They want me to be there tomorrow if I can.

In reality, I can't be there tomorrow. I still have to pack up everything, and go.

I'm sitting here, flabbergasted. I accepted the offer, which means I have to move.

Sometimes it's healthy to buy some technology that seems frilly.

I've had a 17 inch and a 15 inch monitor, siting side by side. This is not very suitable for what I want to do. The 17/17 combo was fine, but unfortunately one of the 17s, didn't survive. It was old, and it died.

So, today, I went to Ginstar, and bought a 21 inch monitor. I have to say, I'm a much happier man now. The increased area I have to work with, is a great addition. Less scrolling than before, and also, it's much easier on the eyes.

I have to say. Happiness is 21 inches. As time goes along, I do plan on getting dual large monitors, and putting them side by side. I would not mind a 23/23 combo. :)

So, this past week, I went to see Rocco Deluca and The Burden. The show was great. Another group, called Five Star Iris, was also there. Kiefer Sutherland was also there, since he supports rock and all that. (Trust me, he said it, and explained it, much better. I am sure someone captured the video somewhere)

The show was very interesting. It was high-energy, professional, and great overall.

I was tired as shit frankly, but all good. I was pretty much starring into space by the end of the show. I know tragic, but it's all good. In all reality, I had fun, and enjoyed the show.

So, today, I got my first official. "We have decided to pursue other candidates at this time" letter.

Granted, I also thing that was good. The main reason being, that I was so focused on that one company, that I didn't apply to a broad range of companies. I focused on this company, and went through with it.

Still, it's all good. This just means, I won't move up north just yet. Maybe if another company comes along, that pleases me, I just might.

I do have to say, I did a phone interview today, with another company, and that went well, I think.

All I have to do now, is respond to those e-mails, and phone calls, that wanted to know if I would be interested in their available positions. The answer now is yes.

This first set, thought me a fair amount about how the processes goes, and I am better for it.

Here we go some more, on the voyage to get a job.